Baby steps to imperfect creation

19th December, 7:12PM. I take baby steps towards imperfect creation. Also, Vessel Management as a new discipline.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Rolling Start And Context
• 0:19 Lowering The Bar For Making
• 0:45 An Epiphany About Devotion
• 1:26 From Saunder To Making Work
• 2:45 Defining Vessel Management
• 3:41 Evolving Desire And Character
• 4:32 Discipline, Grace, And Focus
• 5:27 Habitual Recording And Closure

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:02

This is Norm. 19th of December 2025. 712 pm. Doing a recording in the car as I'm driving on the way to see friends for karaoke. I thought to make this a little bit more informal when it comes to recording monologues and soliloquies out for people to listen to. One, not only in an effort to use this recorder more, but two, to lower the barrier in me creating something and achieving imperfection as opposed to perfection itself. This is part of a growing strange realization that I had over the past couple weeks when I essentially had my brain chemistry changed. I'm not sure what it was. I don't think it was any particular event. Maybe it's just a huge realization, an epiphany, so strong that it's made tangible through realizations and embodiments of beliefs that I knew to be good, but I never thought to be devoted to it. Beliefs like returning to Eterna, where I belong, creating my own corner in the world. Creation, writing characters, thinking about different disciplines, different forms of knowledge, thinking about humanity, exploring saunder, finding the wildfire in all of these experiences. But when you think about saunder and the expression of such, the articulation of such, effort needs to be put in to do so. And you can't just talk about it all the time without actually creating something that people could experience, could receive, could converse with, a piece of work that is ejected out of my body, and that it doesn't need my supervision to allow for people to interact with. A child of my own, essentially. Something that I could love. That is synonymous with my capacity to want to do good for myself, to protect my sovereignty, to build things, to invest in my taste, my wellness, my mind. So I started creating these new terms that I feel are closer to who I am. People talk about bodybuilding and working out and wellness and mental health, etc. Well, I'm gonna put all of it under one umbrella. And in this case, it's gonna be called vessel management. Management of my body, my mind, what distracts me, what I can focus on, where I put my time, the measurement of such. And I call it a vessel. Because as much as this body of mine is the main vessel, my works are where you can find an imprint of my voice. My paintings, my sketches, my body of work. They're all extended organs, or limbs, rather. I want to build that. The foundation for such. To invest in myself so well that everything just flourishes. And there's a certain love language in that. Taking care of yourself is how you love yourself. In the midst of such, I started creating other characters. My relationship with the concept of lust has evolved. My characters have deepened in complexity, and I think that's good. Because it then takes care of different situations that do come up in life that are more gray rather than absolute, that are vague, that are multi-framable, if that's even a word. But I'm excited, you know? I'm excited. There's a wildfire behind beginning this. I want to work out, I want to move, I want to take better supplements, I want to eat better, I want to eat clean. I want to do martial arts. I want to make love with life, with my vessel at its highest form. The graceful version of it. The most graceful version of it. I think that is making me rethink all the decisions I've made maybe in the latter half of this year. Yes, I went to different trips and thought of myself in different ways, but you know, beyond that, wow. I think I'm just going to focus now. Focus and make and find new ways to express myself in the audio world. Doesn't even have to be in the social media world. Don't distract myself there. If I do want to distract myself, distract myself by creating. A small attempt of mine to take a small, tiny baby step towards this, to make this habitual, to record things here and there. It's going to meander a lot. It's going to wander. My thoughts are going to be in very imprecise patterns, I should say. But I don't mind. It's gonna be fun. Take care, stay lovely.